Embrace GRAYce

I’m poking the mama bears with this post 😳 My frustrations are at an all time high…

Please no, I don’t deserve that abuse again. I’ve taken my lashings and I’m still bandaging my wounds as they keep re-opening. The only fear I have left is losing the quick wit I’ve gained as a coping mechanism.

Prosecution isn’t for the fragile—in a societal sense. I’m fragile… like a bomb, not a biodegradable flower.

My personal trauma, and healing like an emotionally mature adult from it, is one of the reasons I’m able to prosecute my second predatory criminal sexual abuse trial where a stepdad raped his very young stepdaughter…..in less than two months.

I wasn’t sexually abused by an adult. I have my own childhood & adolescent trauma you’ll likely never hear about here. As much as it may seem like I’m sharing “too much”, I’ve barely shared anything at all.

To that, I now respond, “Too much by whose standards?” 🙃

The second pedo trial begins in eight days—with a different young, innocent victim abused by an adult she should’ve been able to trust— two days after my oldest Sopchick turns 8 years old.

8 is the same age as the victim when the physical abuse started.

Double the age of a different little girl whose Victim Sensitive Interview I sat in on two weeks ago.

Only a year younger than Grace*, the victim from the first predatory jury trial I lost in August, when her nightly abuse ended.

I can’t tell you how old Mady was when she was first sex trafficked because she doesn’t have a voice anymore.

Except here.

Callie*, another child victim, shared that with me earlier today.

Frustrated is an understatement.

Keep in mind these “stories” aren’t fictional and are only one prosecutor’s limited perspective. You haven’t even heard all the stories. Can you imagine how prevalent this child abuse epidemic is? So why don’t we talk about it more?

Teach them how to use their voice loudly and be heard. Teach your girls AND boys about consent. Do not make the assumption they will learn it elsewhere, it is more likely they will be groomed. Be an actual safe place for your babies, not just pay lip service. Listen to what they say. Be the Mama AND Papa Bears we all claim to be on social media.

From my point of view in the (in)justice system, we aren’t doing enough to protect our babies.

When I say child abuse, I mean mental, physical and sexual abuse. It’s all extremely damaging to our children.

The “Breadcrumbs Movement” started back in the 1970’s with the decision in Roe vs. Wade.

Polarizing opinion alert—I think the Supreme Court got it wrong. My girl RBG thought so too—I’m really missing her wisdom right now.

Hear me out before starting the witch hunt. I didn’t join the white boys club called the patriarchy aka FFs overnight.

Simply stated without explanation—super difficult for me—abortion is an issue that should be decided on a State by State basis.

Religious lobbyists snuck an issue before SCOTUS that should’ve never been considered by the Highest Court of our country.

In 1971, Women and Human Rights Activists stormed the Supreme Court, letting their voices be heard loudly and rightfully celebrated “winning” an issue that shouldn’t even be up for discussion in 2024.

But here we are 50 years later, SCOTUS overturns our “right to abortion”, and century old abortion laws are back.

It set us back and it’s not fair or right. It’s where we are sadly at.

Women could’ve used the “win” as motivation to go back to their respective states and abolish those crusty old abortion laws by getting involved in government.

Instead, we took our bellbottoms back to the kitchen… and ate our breadcrumbs for dinner.

We have a choice: continue to play victim or do what we should’ve done 50 years ago.

Government and politics should not have a control or say over my body or either of my daughter’s bodies. Doesn’t have a say over a man’s body.

End of conversation.

Call it what it is: breadcrumbs, then demand the meal AND dessert you deserve. This isn’t only about abortion.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again—when castration is the standard for pedophiles, that’s when the government can have a say over what I do with my body and whether or not I choose to bear more children to raise in this scary world.

Fact is—and I speak lots of em—women, in a procreation sense, are more powerful than we’ve been conditioned to believe. Without us, there is no next generation en masse.

Men know that and that’s why they want to control our ability to end an unwanted pregnancy. Different opinion, fight me 🤷‍♀️ except I don’t know how to be violent.

It’s science and reality, ladies. If you feel differently, please have a conversation as I’d love some insight on how to help you get better informed, and I don’t know how to fight with my fists. Words, ha ha, I’ll slice you.

State by state means some will continue to criminalize abortion. Let them. And let the woman that choose to reside there thrive in their veil of lies, even when they cross state lines for abortions.

It doesn’t affect you or me. We have a choice too. We have bigger problems to solve.

“An embryo has a heartbeat” is how the FFs brainwash you to believe they care about what we care about—kids. Spoiler: they don’t—for the most part—because if they did, there would be harsher penalties for pedophiles. Simple.

It isn’t all white men. To be fair, adult men were also conditioned as children to believe they are the superior sex—women being inferior.

I won’t even engage in that “red herring” discussion.

Biologically speaking, we are different. That’s ok. One isn’t necessarily better than the other. That’s where perception is skewed. False Dilemma Fallacy. I’ve heard that before.

I’m over labels and pointing fingers. I want accountability and fairness.

What’s equal isn’t always fair.

Don’t teach sex education in schools and don’t teach girls how they get pregnant.

BUT if a young girl gets pregnant, no abortion for you! No parenting classes for you! Stigma and judgment from the world around you!

YET…. too often…. NO accountability for the boy or, more likely, ADULT MAN who knocked you up.

It was god’s will!

GTFO of here. POKE POKE POKE POKE POKE.

If it was god’s will, God would’ve created a less judgmental, more helpful society.

We cannot continue to play victim while pedophiles are having a field day with the babies we are forced to birth.

Sounds outrageous right. See Exhibits A-F listed above. I know of more and the time will come to tell their stories.

These sweet, innocent, young girls that are VICTIMS, were and ARE treated like trash in the (in)justice system. Society isn’t easy on a young mother with a felony record.

Adults need to grow up, so we can do better for our children.

I haven’t shared Callie* girl’s story yet as I only know bits and pieces. Life is busy and we try to stay in the present while catching up on the lifetimes we’ve missed out on.

That’s what building a relationship is about… getting to know each other without judgment or shame… and ignoring what the world says about our places in life.

What do I mean? For those of you who haven’t read Mady’s story, start there. Here is a fragment of Callie’s.

TLDR version? Mady & Callie were criminal defendants in my Will Co PSC happy place courtroom—I was their prosecutor.

I was naive about our societal caste system until a Mayberry Deputy pointed it out to me. I don’t personally identify by my chosen profession, but that doesn’t mean other people don’t have their own perceptions of me based solely on job title.

I love to talk—I could benefit from lessons on being more concise—I am who I am….I also have ethical rules to abide by while working in my job capacity—boring, ruins my fuzzy wuzzy vibe.

A decade ago, I counted convictions with glee, felt horrified losing a trial, offered jail time on most cases—and I was straight up scared to talk to the public and/or defendants. On MISDEMEANOR cases. Talk about shame. I’m horrified!!

And life happens, so our perspective changes. Sometimes quick, other times slow, like a leaky faucet.

Mine did in 2015 when—imagine the surprise— my bridesmaid/childhood best friend walked into my courtroom one magical day, about a month after our wedding 😳

She’s not a lawyer—she also wasn’t a victim on a case or stopping by to see her bestie be a rockstar on the misdemeanor cattle call.

Defendant on a Class A Misdemeanor.

There I am, Sensitive Sally, crying with a fantastic bowl cut.. thanks Ma! Her dad called us tweedle dee and dumb. Clearly guilty as a mother f’er (since the early 90s) and absolutely committed the alleged driving infraction.

I recused myself from prosecuting the case and advised her attorney of our friendship/childhood trauma, as I mistakenly believed all prosecutors wore a white hat of justice regardless of relationships 👀

I still do…. Other elected officials in Will County, not so much…

Looking back it seems that experience unknowingly broke my subconscious caste system. Waiting for the final pictures from our wedding photographer and *gasp* a Defendant was lurking amongst my beautiful friends & family on our WEDDING DAY. The horror!

Defendants, they’re just like us. Imagine that.

EXCEPT pedophiles. Seems to me they are the only ones benefitting from our flawed injustice system.

Well, and the patriarchy/elected officials mentioned a few paragraphs above of course.. Jimmy G, OC Sheriff, DC Weazy, for some reason I picture you three amigos every time patriarchy, corruption, or lack of accountability comes up 🥰

With that… I’m back to pedo trial prep.

Unfortunately for sausage king Anonymous who is trying his (their? 🤭) damndest to get me fired, I’ll have a job until we acknowledge this child abuse epidemic. Something tells me he doesn’t want it to end and is likely a pedophile.

Ironically people aren’t jumping at the opportunity to read hundreds of pages of reports detailing child sexual abuse. Luckily, there are still government agencies like Mayberry wanting to eradicate this very real & gross problem versus be part of it.

Try Again, Anonymous.

Until next time Embrace GRAYce fam! I’ll try to stop overpromising and underdelivering like my former boss, Jimmy G. I didn’t fulfill my promise of posting three times last weekend. The “dear diary” posts are drafted, but need editing… I’ve got big feelings to feel before I really get the big, bad bears panties in a bunch 🤭

Who’s afraid of little old me? You say the next line, Swifties!